Dancigrams!!!

[sadie]

It was a beautiful summer day. Sadie had made plans to spend the day relaxing at the lake by the waterfalls with some of the other Dancigram girls. But those plans had to be canceled. She was a professional, after all.

Sadie hadn't understood why it was that Dancigrams Inc. Ltd. was asked to perform community service in Stormwind. Since when was washing coins a bad thing? Did Mister Garyx Karyll wash the money the wrong way? He did seem very stressed when he communicated the news to her. These humans have some fairly odd customs! At least she liked kids.

---

“What's wrong with my outfit?” Why can't ugly women shut up about my dress. It's -pretty-.

“It's... well. It's not something we want the girls to think is what most ladies wear.” The Orphan Matron gave a nervous smile. “I just don't want them to think they will all grow up to be as pretty as you, miss.”

“Oh!” She blushed. I -am- pretty! “I can put on my company's tabard!” She quickly took it out of her backpack and covered herself in the white and aqua of Dancigrams Inc. Ltd.

“One more thing, miss.” Miss Nightingale hesitated for a second, “Would you mind not teaching the girls any dances? Maybe teach them some Elven songs? They love to sing.”

“I love to sing!” Sadie cheered. She didn't get to sing actual songs much. This could be fun.

---

A couple hours, and a few dozen songs later, Sadie was exhausted and ready to head back to the office. The kids had been great, but there were just so many of them. She couldn't wait to take of her shoes and take a long, relaxing bath.

It took her no less than ten minutes to say goodbye to all the kids. Well, most of them. There was a nice little human girl who had spent the last half hour sitting in her bed, writing. She was probably just shy.

As she stepped out of the Orphanage, she felt a strong pull on her skirt. “Hey!” She turned around ready to lecture some boy on manners when wishing to talk to pretty ladies, but the sight of the little quiet girl took her by surprise.

“Miss Sadie. You work for a -” The girl looked around to see if any of the matrons were near by. “ for the Dancigram company, right? Her voice dropped to a near whisper on the last part.

Sadie smiled and nodded at the girl. “Anything I can do for you, pretty girl?”

“I have a message for someone.” The girl took her right hand from behind her back and revealed a small envelope. “It's all in there.” She was still looking around nervously, afraid the Matrons would interrupt any moment. “I.. I don't have much money. I have been saving!” The girl looked down, and quickly rubbed her eyes. “But I really need you to deliver this message.” She took out a handful of rusty old copper coins.

Oh, it's for a boy! Sadie's heart almost melted. She was a sucker for romance. “Oh, I think I understand the situation. I do have a different rate for this kind of situation, little...”

“Donna. My name is Donna, Miss Sadie.” The girl was afraid she hadn't saved enough.

“First, you have to promise me you'll be a good girl. And second, you have to tell me if this boy is ever mean to you. Us pretty girls have to stick together. Boys can be so dumb!”

The girl quickly hugged Sadie and thanked her. “He is not mean. He's the most handsome Paladin in the world!”

“Alright then, Donna. I promise I will deliver this message as soon as I can. His name and the message are in the envelope, right?”

“Yes! Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!” She still hadn't let go of Sadie.

“Then I should get going. The sooner I deliver it, the better! Elune adore, Donna!”

“May the Light protect you, miss!”

Sadie walked away, thinking of her very own first love. Laro Moonshadow, the cutest boy at Moonglade's spring camp for tomorrow's druids. I wonder who is Donna's Laro. She didn't wait to reach the office. Sadie opened up the envelope and started reading.

To: Bricu Bittertongue.
He is tall like King Varian, strong like Bolvar Fordragon, brave like Uther, and twice as handsome as the young Lord Tarell. He also has red hair and beard. He says he often meets his friends at the “Pig and Whistle.” He sometimes says bad words, but he doesn't mean to!

“Oh! I know the Pig and Whistle!” Sadie decided that a short bath would have to do for the day. There was a Dancigram to deliver. Us pretty girls have to stick together.

[sadie]

I need to learn the name of that cutie.

Sadie had been watching the long haired elf sitting at the main table with the humans who had told her Bricu should be arriving soon. She had already figured out what their babies names would be. Belunia, if it was a girl. She would have her delicate nose and her dad's hair. Eusteros, if it was a boy. He would have her dad's eyes, whatever color they were. She still hadn't been able to look at his no doubt gorgeous face.

She was lost in her thoughts, -where would they live? Would he bring her breakfast to bed? Of course he would!- when she noticed a man standing in front of her.

“I'm Bricu,who the bloody hell are yeh?” He punctuated his question with a large cloud of smoke. The woman who Sadie had briefly talked to stood behind him.

Oh! It's him! Finally! Sadie's eyes shone bright, like two copies of Elune on a cloudless night. “Oh! Mister readhead!”

Bricu's eyes fixed on the curvaceous elf, angrily.

Sadie offered an apologetic smile. “Mister Bree-cuh Bitter Tongues?”

The woman put a hand on Bricu's shoulder, smiling. “This is who was looking for you.” She had already forgotten her name, Threnn Bittertongue. Bricu's wife.

“Close enough.” Bricu brought the cigarette to his mouth, again.

“You have a Dancigram, sir! I was told I could find you here.”

Unbeknown to Sadie, Bricu's friends sitting at the table nearby were paying far more attention to her conversation than they appeared to.

“Do you have time, or am I interrupting?”

Bricu was getting impatient, smoking was losing its soothing effect on him. “Right... Go right ahead.”

“You, uh, want me to leave you to deliver it in private?” The woman started taking a few steps away from Bricu, which she then abruptly stopped at his loud “No!”

“You sure you don't mind it here?” Why is he so impatient? Everybody loves Dancigrams. Maybe he just can't wait to see it!

“No. Go ahead.”

“Want to... make yourself more comfortable or you prefer to stand?” They usually like to sit down. I am going to have to use my special move to win him over. Yes.

Bricu stuck his sword on the ground and leaned on its hilt. “I am comfortable.”

A quick glance at her notes and a few seconds worth of vocalization exercises, Sadie was ready. “Alright!” She stepped forward, standing a mere pace away from Bricu, who frowned at her. Hm, maybe half a step closer. I don't want to let Donna down.

Sadie delivered her message, not realizing she held the full attention of the nearby crowd. She was -in the zone.-

“Mister Bricu, fire in your hair, fire in your eyes.”

Threnn turned her face away, biting her lip.

“You are so handsome, you are so brave.”

Now the fox of an elf, and the blond man at the table were trying to hide their surprise. Another elf, the shirtless one, simply chuckled. A third elf, the one with the pet, remained serious.

Time to step it up, girl. Sadie took a half step, leaving barely enough room for a silk curtain between her and Bricu.

“The nether is this gobshite?” Bricu glared angrily at his friends, before taking a step back.

“I know you are taken, but in another world, I would ask you to marry me.”

The hardly contained chuckles from the men at the table turned into uncontrollable laughter.

“And take me with you to your Northern Country, and be happy forever.”

Bricu's eyes looked as if they were about to pop out of their sockets.

“Will you at least give me my first kiss?”

Behind him, Threnn blinked, incredulous.

“Yeh send this!?” Bricu was again shouting at his friends, who were to busy laughing to respond to him.

“Ta-da!” Sadie jumped and cheered, to finish off the dancigram. Oh, I know just what will make him happy. Sadie reached for her note and clumsily fumbled it, feigning surprise. She then proceeded to turn away from Bricu. Sadie bent over to pick the note up, making sure to keep her legs straight.

But Bricu was still having none of this. He jerked his thumb at Sadie. “Bugger off, you git!” he demanded.

Still -in the zone,- Sadie proceeded to reveal to Bricu the sender of the dancigram. “This is a message from little Donna. She is the cutest girl in the world!” Us pretty girls have to stick together! “Little girls from the orphanage get a discount!”

The blonde man was now shaking at his seat, his face rapidly turning red.

Bricu's shoulders dropped, as he sighed. He took out a small pouch and reached into it, to offer Sadie a tip for her services.

Amidst the ruckus that was now the Pig and Whistle, she caught Threnn's complaint, mockingly. “Oh, love, I've got competition.”

The others were not as forgiving, Sadie overheard the blond man, the boss of the crew, say “One o' the... Ahahaha... One o' the heh'orphans!” in between fits of laughter. The cute elf joined in, “The Orphanage-?! Bricu, you dog!” Even Bricu's wife had been rendered incapable to stop shaking.

“She was very emphatic that I deliver it with my best dance. I am glad you liked it!” Another satisfied customer! Sadie always loved the thrill of a satisfied customer and a happy crowd. Oh! Don't forget to hand out cards! She hurried to take out a few business cards.

A loud thump interrupted her. The boss had fallen off his chair, and could still be seen shaking on the ground, belly up. Tears covered his cheeks.

Bricu did his best to ignore the scene. “Thank yeh. Right. Now, please, bugger off”

The cute elf looked even hotter as he smashed the table with his open hand. Sadie's thoughts wandered at the sight of him swinging his hand in that very fashion. “The Or-hor-fa-ahn-age! Ooh!”

Bricu was starting to lose his patience. “Oi, get yer arse off the floor.” He was consuming his cigarette faster than she'd seen any man do.

Threnn approached Sadie, trying to calm herself further with each step. “If you see Donna, uh, miss, tell her that was sweet”

Sadie bowed at the couple, and started to make her way out of the tavern. Oh, what the hell. Elune, grant me luck! She breathed in slowly, and approached the cute elf she'd been eying all night.

She would later learn that his name was Ulthanon, and that he was taken, much like Bricu. That didn't stop her from slipping a note with her address in his pants' pocket before leaving. It's meant to happen, him and me. I know it.

Sadie tried to focus on the satisfaction of a dancigram well delivered. Tonight it was about Donna. She still had time to make that cutie that they belonged together.

Walking out, her chin up high, she could still hear scattered laughter. The last words she was able to make out came from the boss, “Ah, come off it, Bittertongue, that wis feckin' -adorable-. How auld's wee Donna?”

I told you they would love it, Donna! Sadie pumped her fist, with all the grace of an Elven princess.

[sadie]

((So, the actual happenings during Bricu's dancigram are much more hilarious than anything I can write, so I present you the transcript of the events.

I had to edit some stuff out of the "real" post, as it ended up already long. But I figured people here might want to see the original log. So, here it is!))

Threnn says: Uh. 'lo, love.
Ulthanon says: Ooh! I do.
Tarquin says: Why, alwis, mate.
Ulthanon says: But just in general principle.
Threnn says: She's, uh. Over there.
Bricu pulls paper and tobacco from his pack. With a few deft motions, he rolls a cigarette.
Bricu takes out Smokey's Lighter from his pack and lights his cigarette.
Tahlian giggles.
Tahlian ’s Cat Daishar gnarlsh contentedly.
Bricu pulls a long drag from his cigarette, exhaling a cloud of smoke a few moments later.
Aleros says: Sounds like I won't need to get in contact with him for more passengers then.
You eye Bricu up and down.
Tarquin ambles over to Elly and carefully retrives another glass of whiskey. He does not make eye contact with anyone, or look at Bricu.
Bricu says: I'm bricu--who the bloody hell are yeh?
Bricu pulls a long drag from his cigarette, exhaling a cloud of smoke a few moments later.
Sadriah notices he -is- a human redhead!
You cheer at Bricu.
Sadriah says: Oh mister redhead!
Threnn leans on the bar.
Sadriah says: Ahem!
Bricu glares angrily at you.
Sadriah looks at her note.
Bricu taps his foot as he waits for you.
Sadriah says: Mister Bree-cuh Bitter Tongues?
Threnn says: This is who was looking for you.
Bricu says: Close enough.
Sadriah says: Thanks Missues!
Ulthanon glances behind him at the exchange.
Sadriah says: You have a Dancigram sir!
Threnn shrugs at Bricu. Who knows?
Bricu peers at Threnn searchingly.
Tahlian mutters, "Shush, Daishar..."
Ulthanon says: Oh hell.
Bricu pulls a long drag from his cigarette, exhaling a cloud of smoke a few moments later.
Sadriah says: I was told I could find you here.
You peer at Bricu searchingly.
Tarquin takes a quick swallow of whiskey, still staring intently at the table.
Sadriah says: DO you have time, or am I interrupting?
Bricu says: Right....Go right ahead.
Sadriah still thinks the pretty brunette would be a good Dancigram girl.
Threnn says: You, uh, want me to leave you to deliver it in private?
Bricu says: NO
Sadriah says: You sure you don't mind it here?
Tarquin snorts back laughter. Badly.
Bricu says: Nope.
Bricu says: Go ahead.
Sadriah says: Want to... make yourself more comfortable or you prefer to stand?
Ulthanon raises his hand.
Aleros pulls out a book, what seems to be a journal, and continues writing from where handwritten text left off.
Bricu peers at you searchingly.
Ulthanon says: *I* certainly dont mind it here!
Bricu says: I am comfortable.
Sadriah takes another quick glance at her note.
Sadriah says: Alright!
Bricu leans on his The Blade of Harbingers
Sadriah warms up her voice with a couple quick vocalization exercizes.
Tarquin takesh another long pull of whiskey as quickly as he can manage before settling in to watch the show.
Aleros thinks Bricu likes to show off epics.
Sadriah gets a bit -too- close to Bricu.
Tahlian giggles.
You dance with Bricu.
Bricu thinks taht Ale wants to See Bricu's Epix.
Sadriah starts singing to a simple, familiar tune.
Aleros has seen Bricu's "Legendary"
Sadriah says: "Mister Bricu,
Sadriah says: "Fire in your hair
Threnn is biting her lip. Hard.
Sadriah says: "Fire in your eyes.
Bricu pulls a long drag from his cigarette, exhaling a cloud of smoke a few moments later.
Sadriah says: "You are so handsome,
Sadriah says: "you are so brave.
Ulthanon slaps his hand over his mouth, laughing.
Tarquin makesh a strange choking-whimpering noise, like something in his neck just curled up and died.
Tahlian watches the human and elf, shomewhat nonplussed but definitely amused.
Sadriah takes another step, getting close again.
You dance with Bricu.
Bricu says: The nether is this gobshite?
Aleros stops talking to listen
Bricu tells you NO. Not going to happen.
Sadriah says: "I know you're taken,
Tarquin says: Hrrgmfffll.
Sadriah says: "but in another world,
Bricu pulls a long drag from his cigarette, exhaling a cloud of smoke a few moments later.
Sadriah says: "I would ask you to marry me,
Aleros meant stops writing.
Tarquin says: Mmpffrrfehefehhfffff!
Sadriah says: "And take me with you to your northern country.
Ulthanon says: Snrk-! Bwha.
Sadriah says: "And be happy forever.
Aleros can't help but snort.
Bricu is not smiling.
Sadriah says: "Will you at least give me my first kiss?"
Ulthanon is.
Bricu says: Yeh send this?
Ulthanon says: BaHAha.
Threnn blinks.
Sadriah drops her note "casually"
Bricu jerks his thumb to Sadriah.
Tarquin 's expression can't be seen, as his face is buried in his crossed arms. He appesrs to be twitching slightly.
Sadriah bends over to pick it up, right on Bricu's face.
Sadriah says: Ta da!!!!!
Bricu pulls a heavy drag from his smoke. He looks Sadriah in the eye as he blows smoke into Sadriah's face.
Bricu says: Bugger off you git.
Sadriah says: This is a message from...
Sadriah looks at her note.
Tarquin says: Mffffrrfaaaaaahahahahahahahahahahahahah!
Bricu says: Who?
Sadriah says: "Little Donna"
Sadriah says: She is the cutest girl in the world!
Ulthanon says: Snrklsrk- - - bwaaaa hahaha!
Sadriah says: Little girls from the orphanage get a discount!
Threnn blinks again.
Sadriah says: Are you sure, sir?
Sadriah says: I'm already paid.
Threnn says: Oh, love, I've got competition.
Ulthanon might be hyperventilating.
Tarquin says: Are yeh fuckin' - aahahahahhaaha!
Bricu says: just take it.
Tarquin says: One o' the...ahahaha...one o' the heh'orphans!
Sadriah says: She was very emphatic that I deliver it with my best dance.
Ulthanon says: The *Orphanage*?!
Sadriah says: I am glad you liked it!
Threnn 's shoulders are shaking.
Tarquin says: Och, Bricu, yehaahahahahahahahaahaha...
You cheer at Bricu.
Ulthanon says: Daaaah!
Sadriah says: Here!
Ulthanon says: Bricu, you DOG!
Sadriah takes out a small busness card.
Tarquin just trailsh off and fallsh out of his chair, convulsing.
Sadriah hands it to Bricu.
Aleros is trying very hard to supress laughter.
Bricu says: Thank yeh.
Sadriah says: Keep us in mind for your messaging needs!
Sadriah says: Dancigrams!
Bricu says: Right. NOw, please, bugger off.
Tahlian ’s Cat Daishar purrsh happily. ...hic!
Sadriah says: We are the newest and bestest way of communication!
Sadriah pouts.
Ulthanon pounds his open palm against the wall.
Threnn wipes tears from her eyes.
Bricu says: Oi, get yer arse off teh floor.
You eye Ulthanon up and down.
Tarquin leans against his chair, chortling.
Ulthanon says: The Or-hor-fa-ahn-age! Ooh!
Threnn says: If you see Donna, uh, miss, tell her that was sweet.
Tarquin says: I'ma...ahahaha...prolly kinna stan' straaahahahah....
Sadriah looks Ulthanon up and down.
Threnn glances down at Tarquin.
Threnn says: You... uh.
Threnn snickers.
Sadriah says: What about you, cute thing?
Ulthanon wipes a tear from his eye.
Threnn says: Want a hand up, there, boss?
Bricu says: I'm changin'.
Sadriah says: Are you taken like Mister Bree-coo?
Tarquin says: ...prolly...aheheh...unsafe yet...
Ulthanon says: Kid, that was a laugh, but I'm taken too.
Tahlian glancesh around. The cornersh of his mouth are twitching.
Sadriah puts her arm over his shoulder.
Ulthanon grins like an idiot.
Tarquin says: ...och, she's on Kaidos the now!
Sadriah says: Oh!
Sadriah pouts and sniffles.
Ulthanon says: But give mister Bittertongue's regards to the Orphanage for sure!
Threnn looks towards the door.
Sadriah says: Why are all the hotties taken?
Sadriah says: You look tired, sir.
Tarquin slams his face back into his chair, coughing laughter.
Sadriah says: I used to work as a masseuse, you know.
Threnn says: Oh, sweet Light, I'm not only on the couch, I'm not even in the Rose, am I?
Sadriah puts her hands over Ulthanon's shoulders.
Tarquin says: Aheheh. Heh.
Bricu peers at Threnn searchingly.
Tarquin manages to get to his feet.
Ulthanon says: Hey, hey hey.
Bricu says: Depends.
Ulthanon says: Go talk, to, uh...
Aleros says: Now now Ulth, massage a month helps the muscles
Ulthanon jerks a thumb at Tahlian.
You nod at Aleros.
Tarquin says: Ah, come off it, Bittertongue, that wis fuckin' /adorable/. How auld's wee Donna?
Ulthanon says: Go talk to him.
Threnn says: Eight?
Tarquin slumps into his seat, still giggling faintly.
Sadriah says: But he's not as cute.
Bricu says: 'bout Eight.
Tahlian quirks an eyebrow at Ulthanon.
Ulthanon says: Only woman in *his* life is the cat next to him.
Sadriah pouts more.
Tarquin says: She prolyl saved pennies fer /months/ ta get yeh that.
Sadriah says: OK, play hard to git, Mister.
Tahlian says: D'you want the poor kid to get eaten by an angry tiger? You're cruel, you are.
Sadriah says: My name is Sadriah.
Threnn eyes Bricu up and down.
Sadriah reaches for a note and puts it herself in his front pants' pocket.
Threnn says: Depends on what?
Ulthanon says: Nah, trust me.
Bricu drops his cigarette on the floor, and stubs it out with his boot.
Ulthanon says: He's a good guy!
Sadriah says: ...taht's my adress, hottie.
Bricu says: How creative yeh can get.
Tarquin finds his whiskey, wiping tears from his eyes.
Ulthanon says: Me and... uh... him... go waaay back.
Sadriah bats her eyelashes.
Sadriah says: Oops!
Sadriah drops a note, bends over to pick it up.
Ulthanon takes the card and looks at it.
Threnn says: Oh, I can be creative.